Weekend Phone Calls

You know what kills me? Something I can't prevent at all of course; phone usage! It's his weekend with the children. It's our weekend to bond and yet, it seems every few hours there's a text from bio-mom, or a call to bio-mom. Just make it stop already! Yes, yes, I know I cannot prevent the kids from talking to their own mother (nor would I want that actually) but I really wish I could make these two preteens be more present and not drowning in a sea of text and calls during our limited weekend time. How are they supposed to bond with him, much less me, when they're constantly on the phone? With his ex? 

I've quickly learned that I have no privacy. Anything we do or say together is fair game to get back to the ex. "Daddy did this...." or "Did you know she did...?". The ex thrives on being at the center of attention and is a gossip queen. She loves holding the proverbial puppet strings in his family despite being divorced for numerous years! (Don't ask, that's a whole separate blog!). And while there is nothing to hide, the fact is, I am not that present in her household, I'm not allowed to be. And while I don't need to know what goes on during the weeks we are with out the children, I'd just like her to respect our space and time to bond - and she doesn't do that and never will. 

Are they bored you ask - is that why the children spend so much time on the phone? Dad has actually put restrictions on phone usage in efforts to keep the kids more involved, but let me tell you, these kids are well entertained! Lord knows I bust my butt and so does he to do things as a family. This weekend for example was filled with an extended family dinner, early morning group errands and projects, pancake breakfasts, pumpkin farm visits, petting zoos, haunted houses, pumpkin painting, house decorating, mess making, home cooked dinners, evening movie time, catch playing - - - you name it and we did it. And yet, the bio-mom invasion via the phone continues. 

I'm sure there's a case of bitter grapes and whining in this post from me. Of course there is. I want to be so awesome and bonded with these kids that they forget all about their other life, if even for just a weekend. I know, I know. Time. Time will reveal all and I just need to continue to work on and build the relationships, memories and experiences that I can, and want (and hope for) but in the meantime, I feel like weekends are "court supervised" with bio-mom just a phone call/speaker away. Anyone else ever feel like this?